The following is the letter Cathy wrote in October 2018 and had intended to deliver to the judge at sentencing.

Your Honor,

Almost two years ago this February, my family’s life was forever changed. My cousin Kevin Archibald was driving home from work and was hit head on and killed by an intoxicated driver. The evidence has been presented in the court by the lawyers and witnesses; my hope with my words today are to share what a beautiful human Kevin was and how his loss leaves a hole in the lives of our family and his community.

When I think of Kevin, a strong memory comes up, a foundational memory of who Kevin was in my eyes. As a child, I looked up to him, my older (by 9 years) cousin who was reserved but very thoughtful. When I was about 12, we went on a trip with my grandparents to my grandpa’s small hometown in North Carolina, Fair Bluff, and I remember an argument happened with Kevin and my grandpa. I was young and couldn’t understand all the details, but I knew that it was about Kevin standing up to the way black people were treated in that small town. Again, I didn’t know the details, but it is significant to me now, because as an adult I always admired how Kevin stood up for different groups of oppressed people — whether they were gay, introverted, racially oppressed, economically oppressed or just didn’t fit into the social norms. His whole life he would stand up for what he believed in, would speak up for those whose voice was not being heard, and did so with grace and intelligence.

I feel called to speak up for Kevin today, as he would speak up for others throughout his life. He should be here with us today. He should be with his amazing life partner and wife, Anne Callery, and planning their next adventure to the UK or road trip up the coast. Kevin should be enjoying their weekly dinners with his sister Amanda Anderson and her two kids, Delenn and Sean. His other siblings, Meghan Rice and Patrick McKowen, should be looking forward to spending the holidays with him and enjoying his latest endeavors in vegan baking. His mother, Maryanne McKowen, should not have spent the last two years suffering the emotional grief that comes from losing her son in this way, all while she spends her day as a therapist helping others with their grief. Kevin should be surfing the waves of the Pacific Coast on the weekends or joining up for evening ice hockey games. This list can go on and on of what he should be doing and whose lives are affected by this loss, this loss that didn’t have to happen this way on that night on the highway.

Kevin was a kind man who loved to grow as a human and was always pushing himself to try out new interests. He loved his wife with such a deep love, really one that I have rarely witnessed. He was always thinking of his nieces and nephews and how he could better their lives with his presence and monetary investments for their future. His eyes would light up when he shared about the latest restaurant he went to in San Francisco with Anne or their big idea to leave the Bay Area and maybe try out a new spot in Oregon. Kevin was deliberate in the way he lived his life, many years as a vegan and alcohol-free man, who would choose to speak up for the oppressed even if that wasn’t the easy thing to do.

I miss my cousin and carry his light in my heart. I also carry some fear in my body when I drive my car now, always on my mind that there are drivers out there that are intentionally driving while impaired and may hurt me or my children. I believe a long incarceration will prevent other families and other communities from feeling the pain and suffering our family and this community are enduring and will continue to endure.

Thank you for really hearing my words today.

Cathy Small Tuttle